So a guy I know was reading my blogs just the other day and then asked me "Why are you so unhappy? You seem to be always cheerful but you write like your life's a huge tragedy ". And I was like "I am not unhappy...Am I?" I have to admit that he left me thinking for a while. Then my friend tried to explain to him that most of the things I write are pure fiction (or wasted fiction as I call them). "See, she never gets mad at anything or anyone. She hardly ever complains about anything. She's always happy. When she writes she gets rid of the things that bother her, that's all." I ended up quite confused about having two persons that apparently know me better than myself. I do get mad sometimes, I do a lot of complaining, and I´m not always happy. But my life is not a tragedy, and I am definitely not so unhappy. I just happen to write what comes to my mind. Is there anything wrong with that? I promise to start writing about sunsets and flowers. I will try to write like a happier person.

10 things I love

enough! even a grief loving creature like me gets tired of weeping sometimes. these are 10 things that make me HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY.

1. VILLE VALO (I could actually write over a thousand reasons why I love him :P, Darkstorm you know what I mean!)

2. my dog (actually she is reason #1)
3. my friends (sorry guys, Mila is ALWAYS first)
4. coffee!!!!!!
5. writing (and creating new and extremely stupid words)
6. coffee+cigarrette+nice interesting conversation
7. coffee+cigarrette+books
8. ridiculously expensive perfumes!
9. iced caramel macchiato!! (wait a minute, this counts as part of #4)
9. Pirates of the Caribbean
10. my brother! (he's so stupid, FUN!)

But actually what I love the most is to have someone to laugh my ass off with.

OK I could go on, and on, and on, and on..........

they say to cry is to know that you're alive

unveileD

Some call it luck, some say it's fate. The truth is someone wrote a few lines for us to play. MY truth is that I finally found the answer that for so long I had to await. I was getting ready to bury him. Had cut the flowers that would wither on his grave, and shut my eyes already burning from a million mourning tears not yet been shed. But just today I saw things clear. Just tonight the truth was unveiled. The truth is we were already buried together. A thousand years ago or so, someone wrote somewhere that we would be bound for eternity. Something brought us back together. Someone else tore us apart. We have been nothing but puppets of everyone's will. They left us unable to feel.

Tonight, it is over. I held you tight while you slept somewhere. I kissed you in the distance, and swore that I will never hurt you again. I begged that nothing bad would ever happen to you. I set you free from the millenarian cage where someone trapped us together. Now it is over. We both are free.

I burned the book, nothing else is written for both of us.The rest of our story is now in your hands... and in mine. All I can say is I'm sorry that we had to meet again like this. All I want to say is that I love you forever. YOU, the one with eyes like an ocean. My secret favorite lover. My eternal dearest friend.

whenever i feel lonely i turn to music as my universal remedy. tonight, however, music seems to hate me. i spent over five minutes trying to decide which cd to play (which never happens). when i finally decided to grab sponge's "wax ecstatic", i found that the cd was not inside. so i believe it ran away 'cause no one that i know likes that band, therefore the chances that someone may have borrowed it without permission are zero. disappointed, i looked for moist's "creature". that one i'm sure my brother must have somewhere in the universal mess that he calls his room, only that he locked the door and then passed out, so no "creature" for me tonight. i turned on the radio, but i had forgotten that the only station that i used to listen to became something else, so instead of the rasmus or blink 182 i got some stupid politician talking about...WTF???!! THE INFLUENCE THAT BIG BROTHER HAS ON OUR ALREADY FUCKED UP POLITICAL SYSTEM???!!!! and it was either that or britney spears, or enrique iglesias...so i turned the radio off. and winamp is taking ages to open, so forget about my downloads. perhaps music needs a break from me. perhaps music got tired of me always looking for her when there's no one around. perhaps i'm facing some kind of musical strike. perhaps music just can't stand the sound of my voice when i start singing. but one thing i know FOR SURE: i like it when people hate me, but to have music hate me too is NOT fun.



wait a minute....is music a he or a she?????

i can't sleep

alright i MAY have a problem with caffeine... but now that i have admitted it, perhaps i should think about rehab.

his name is

Tonight he sleeps
in a distant frozen bed that once belonged to me...
or did I belong to it? I forgot.
All i know is someone sleeps with him tonight.
a ghost between those sheets that once swallowed me,
a stranger in those arms that once held me tight,
a spare romance, a quick replace...
another me calls his name in the depth of his realm.

Endless hours craving for his taste,
an infinite silence when I scream his name,
a million tears over his blurry face,
to end up with nothing but these lines in despair.

His name is one that I will never call again.

welcome to idyland

Good night everyone. I was just thinking about it and, hey why not? I should write in English for my non Spanish-speaking friends around the world that decide to land in my planet every once in a while. So I created this blog (out of boredom, of course) basically for you guys. I want to share these pieces of me with you. Only that I don't know how I will do writing in another language. hell, who cares! Thx for stopping by.